KEEP CALM AND CARRY ON

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

A work of Slighty embellished nonfiction

I was walking down the street, like I always do, cos I like to walk, you see more if you walk. So I was walking down the street and I saw this cool cat with a saxophone, he wasn’t very cool but he had this sax which made him cool. Well he was wearing a dusty grey baker boy hat and he must only been around a meter high, so he was a Midget, a cool midget, on the side of the street, wearing a gray baker boy hat and playing a saxophone. Well.. I thought this cool cat, sax playing midget was Busking for a few bucks, so I tossed him a couple as I walked past. He didn’t have a hat, or nothing, he just had his Sax case, but it was closed,, so I just kind a Tossed it to him.. Hoping it would land near enough for him to pick it up later? But what it does right, the couple a bucks I toss the midget, it hits the sax, right in the bell of the thing, and makes a hell of a noise, and scares the shit outta the Midget. It must a gone right down into the bell cos the sax wasn’t playing any more.

Well you’d never guess what that midget did next. He Put down his sax and come right up to me.

“Whats your problem Pal?” he Had a winy hi pitched midget voice, like a munchkin that just inhaled a helium balloon. Could you believe he had the nerve to do that, after I just tossed him a couple a bucks? Come and Ask me if I had a problem with his balloon sucking goddamn sonofabitch midget voice.?

Well I decided then and there that this midget was not the cool sax playing midget in a gray baker boy hat that I thought he was, no instead I decided that he didn’t even play that god damn sax very well at all so do you no what I did,? I kicked him. Right in his midget stomach.

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